Officially Technological

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Moving On

Not really, I just thought that sounded better than "Not Moving On". I'm still really bummed about Sam, but at least I can look at his kennel without bursting into tears, and Brian gave me a book that he made of pictures we had of Sam. That was really sweet. So, I am doing a little better, but still sad about that.

OK so in other news, my student teaching is getting totally out of control. I'm so frustrated. I think that's all I work on, think about, dream about etc. etc. I think it's driving me nuts. I think part of the problem is that I only have one class, so there's nothing by which to compare them. Am I effective? Don't know. Compared to what? Am I fun? Don't know. Compared to what? Have I made positive relationships? Don't know. Compared to what? Have I taught any math at all?... You get the drift. It seemed like when I had several classes throughout the day I didn't have this particular problem, because a bad day with one class was a good day with another. Ugh. Then, I am being observed literally the rest of this week, which is a lot of pressure and hours and hours of lesson planning (every time you're observed, you have to put your lesson plans in the official lesson plan template). Today and tomorrow, I'm being observed by my cooperating teacher, and Friday I'm being observed by my university supervisor. So, I'm a little stressed out. I also sent mid-terms yesterday, so now I have residual paperwork that accompanies those. Yikes.

Anyway, I would love to teach non-freshmen some time and see how it is with other classes. Better? Worse? The same? It would be fun to be a fly on other people's walls. Just so I'd have something to measure by. Although teaching is not really the type of field where comparing serves you well, it would just be nice to know that others are in the same boat as me.

Well, enough ranting. I promise to try to be much more cheerful the next time I post. Until then... :)
posted by Julie at 8:52 AM


I'm so sorry that things are so hard still with Sam. But I'm sure it probably will be for a while, and sometime you'll look at his kennel and smile to remember what a great dog he was.

Good luck with your observations! I'm sure you'll do just fine. It sounds like fun, except for all the extra work, and I'm sure you'll feel better after you get some feedback. It'll be good to get another perspective.

I'll be praying for you!

11/2/09 09:45  

I just read about Sam... When I lost Patches(my cat), it was pretty bad for a while. But, it gets easier in time.

I hope student teaching gets easier. My observing teacher was weird though. I hope to see you this weekend.

11/2/09 11:10  

i'll pray for you for the rest of this week. sounds draining.

11/2/09 19:51  

I AM TOTALLY IN YOUR EXACT SAME BOAT. It feels like I'm in a sinking dingy in the middle of a hurricane with every kind of sea predator there is lurking in the water while I'm feverishly trying to save the 20 10-year-olds on board from drowning. That's what teaching feels like to me. And the crazy thing is, I still like it (not the sinking feeling but the teaching part). I may have to post this...

11/2/09 20:24  

It gets better. It just takes an awfully long time. I used to cry a lot. Now I just cry occasionally, over really big stuff.

You've really nailed one of the things that's tough about the job; you don't really get any clear feedback on how it's going. It's hard to look at the end of the day and say, "See! Here's what I got done today!" It's a good thing you got the quilt thing going- don't give it up!

You are also exactly right about not comparing yourself, but needing to see that other people are in the same boat. Trust me, they are, maybe not today, but some days they are.

Don't give up!

14/2/09 17:16  

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