Officially Technological

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

I Suppose I'm Stressed

I'm not really sure what my deal is. I've been have stress dreams. You know the kind, the kind that are urgent and/or frightening and you wake up feeling like you could use a good nap. Not that anxiety dreams are the end of the world, because they're not. It's just that I've been noticing the tell-tale signs of being stressed out without really being aware that I was stressing myself out. Here's some of the signs (at least for me).
Seriously, the other day, Brian went to the bathroom, and I kinda sat in the corner of the couch and was dreaming (an anxiety dream - mind you) by the time he came back into the room. I think I'm tired, but I don't know why. I mean, I know I have a lot going on in my life, but let's face it - who doesn't have a lot going on? Maybe I have a bug, or am fighting alergies. Tis the season for alergies - and they can totally screw me up.

I'm feeling a little wimpy right now because there's a couple that goes to our church whose baby just died of SIDS. These people are social workers, and work with troubled teenagers, so it's not like they have an easy 9 to 5 to go to and sleep in their cubes until they get over it. Anyway, they have so much going on in their lives right now. They still have two little boys, and they have an extremely stressful job, and they have to mourn the loss of their baby. And what do I have really? Comparitively speaking? I have happy stress. I have stress where you get something happy at the end. Yeah, wedding woes.... blah, blah, blah. But I'm getting married. And I get to go to Maine for a week and eat lobster. Yeah, I'm techinically living in three different spots (in two states) right now.... blah, blah, blah. But I get to live in one spot with someone I like for the next 75 years. Yeah, I just started a new job.... blah, blah, blah. But it's the first job I've actually enjoyed and could see myself doing for a while. So, I'm whining about being stressed out and overwhelmed, and it's true, I am overwhelmed and stressed out, but while I'm overwhelmed and stressed out with planning the details of a life I can't wait to live, some people are overwhelmed and stressed out planning the details of a life they would have never chosen.

I know what that feels like, I've been there. I've been in the spot where you plan around something that you dread but can't avoid, and it's not any fun (though nothing even half as sad as lossing a child). So, I guess what I'm saying, in my self-directed lecture (better known as a rant) is that I should probably just get over it. I should probably just plan an extra hour to sleep, and keep moving and just enjoy it, because even though it sucks (I'm so tired of worrying about how the lemonade is going to get mixed at the reception I could puke) right now, I know that it is all just stuff that's going to get done so that I can enjoy being married. So, that's that, and with that being said, if I'm going to be getting an extra hour of sleep tonight, I really need to get started on that.
posted by Julie at 10:42 PM


ACK! You're acquiring it!

I swear there is a chronic marriage disease of some sort. Around the same time frame before our wedding I had exactly the same symptoms. And let me tell you, they don't go away. They get worse!

Even now, I beg Vince to go to bed around 10. But sadly, he's set a curfew for me. We can't go to bed until 11. It stinks. I feel like a little kid who is made to go to bed at 8 p.m. in the summer.

24/5/06 21:42  

Ugh! You mean it sticks??

25/5/06 21:18  

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